EDITOR’S NOTE: THIS COMMENTARY FROM REPRESENTATIVE CALVIN MUSSELMAN IS PART OF UTAH POLITICAL UNDERGROUND’S OPINION SERIES REFLECTING ON 9/11’s 20th ANNIVERSARY.
Ten years prior to the attack on 9/11 I was still a very young man. I was starting the second chapter of my college experience at a new school. It was a bit of a stressful time, honestly. College can be stressful, but in-addition my father was slowly losing his battle with cancer which was near unbearable. Watching a man I had always viewed as being made of iron, wither away to almost nothing, rattled me. I stayed with my parents and brother in a small apartment while attending school and my father received cancer treatments. With all that was happening in my life at that time, I had never considered that I might be activated and shipped off to fight in a war.
There I was in the kitchen of our little apartment when the phone rang. Answering the phone, I heard the words, “Raging Bull,” uttered by a friend and leader. I was being activated. I was in the Utah National Guard and enjoyed my military experience. Normally I would have been excited about being activated and serving in some capacity but fighting in a war? At that point in time, I just could not process that possibility.
Given the circumstances with the invasion of Kuwait by the Iraqis in the early 1990s, at the time, I had a fairly good idea what was coming with the activation. My brother and I were in the same unit, the 1457th Combat Engineer Battalion. We had the abnormal experience of being activated and serving together. It was a whirlwind of experiences. There were highs and lows and everything in between. What was soon revealed with near perfect clarity, what most citizens felt they knew already, was that the American military might was truly an unstoppable force. From February 24th to February 27th coalition forces crushed the invaders of Kuwait. In less than 5 days 100,000 Iraqi troops surrendered and by the end there were 500,000 Iraqi troops taken as POW’s. It was something to behold. Complete domination.
The experience of the Gulf War, I think for most Americans, made us feel somewhat invincible. It made us feel like there would be no one on earth that would dare cross us, let alone be bold enough to do it on U.S. soil. It was 5 years later, in 1996, that Osama Bin Ladin issued the declaration of war against the United States and the West, calling for the death of Americans wherever they are found. To be honest, I did not know who he was. 5 more years passed and now the U.S. was a full 10 years removed from Desert Storm. With the horrific events of 9/11 unfolding before our eyes we all learned quickly who Osama Bin Ladin was. We would all learn together how hate can push our fellow man to do horrible things.
I suspect the range of emotions that I felt on Sep. 11, 2001, was like what most had felt. Fear, bewilderment, anguish, heart ache, helplessness, and then anger. It was horrific. I immediately felt a vulnerability I had never felt before. It was an unfamiliar feeling. It became clearer with each passing day after the attack that we all had become too comfortable and too arrogant when it came to the diligence that is necessary to protect ourselves.
Fast forward to today, as I write this, I have some feelings and thoughts that are different from that time, but some that are the same as I reflect on the events of 9/11. I am still sad and have heartache for those that were lost and for their family and friends. I have the same feelings for those that survived. What I don’t feel is “helpless”. We have found ways to balance our freedoms and maintain the diligence necessary to protect. That balance has not been easy and there is still work to do. I am grateful for those that work so hard and make unfathomable sacrifices to protect.
As I write this, I recognize what 9/11 means to me now. It represents a great sacrifice. A sacrifice for freedom. Sacrifice for a greater good. Sacrifice for the protection of a lofty ideal, and for the people that pursue those lofty ideals. That lofty ideal is the creation and continuation of the United States of America.
