In politics, you’re either on-message or you’re losing. Let’s get to it.

Welcome to On Message, a weekly look at where the battle lines are drawn and who is winning the war of words.

This week… Ineffective Incivility.

Over the past week, political headlines in Utah have been dominated by groups of people who have forgotten how to behave – or never got the lesson in how our system of government works.

Now, I want to start by acknowledging a fact we often overlook: Those who behave this way are rarely a majority; they may be within the room or arena they occupy when they demand attention, but more often than not they are the obnoxious minority.

And the media is always ready to show us this bad behavior and call it news. If we’re not savvy consumers of media we can allow ourselves to think loud equals majority.

It rarely does.

At last week’s Republican State Convention, delegates “really showed old Mitt Romney” by booing the senator for what they consider high crimes against the guy who lost the last election.

To his credit, Senator Romney gave his remarks and even pushed back on those trying to disrupt his elected official report to the party.

The boos were not reserved just for Romney as delegates also booed Governor Spencer Cox, who had just won at the convention a year ago.

To my point about a minority trying to masquerade as a majority: there are some 4,000 state delegates and only about half that number were on hand to vote (or boo) at the convention. And only a fraction of that fraction were those being disruptive.

Later in the week, a Granite School Board meeting was abruptly adjourned when parents, who came to voice their opposition to mask mandates continuing for schools while being relaxed in other ways throughout the state, disrupted the meeting.

For most people, we just see this as a terribly unproductive way to resolve any disagreement.

So, what’s the lesson?

First, a word to those who deal with the bad behavior:

Most people just want to be heard. Taking some time to listen and ask earnest questions of those who feel strongly enough to behave in a disruptive way is a great place to start. You might also learn something about why they hold such strong opinions. You don’t have to agree with them, but listening is always a productive first step.

Of course, you can’t do that from the podium of the convention when you have five minutes to speak and you can’t do that when you have a mob in full force. But finding ways to listen to the concerns of people who feel they aren’t being heard or represented will go a long way toward preventing situations like this.

And for those who employ tactics like booing, shouting down those who speak in opposition to you and, yes, those who have completely forgotten how to behave in a civilized manner… You aren’t winning any hearts or minds. You are trying to get what you want through intimidation and that’s what people do when they are either incapable or too lazy to persuade. Or both.

As a mother would tell a misbehaving toddler… use your words.

What is your argument? What facts or experiences are you backing it up with? How are you trying to build a bridge where you give a little to get a little?

Now, is there a way to do it so you achieve your objective or move the needle in your favor? Also yes, but it takes some thought and emotional intelligence. And that’s the part that has been sorely lacking.

Now, is there a time and place for protest? Of course. If you have a rational, well-thought-out argument to make but can’t get anyone to listen, then you may have reason to demand attention.

But when you get that attention… you better be ready to make a compelling argument that leads people to agree with you.

If not, you’re just wasting everyone’s time.

That’s it for this week.

More On Message in the next issue of the Utah Political Underground.

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