For months some of Trump’s most ardent supporters have said he would be reinstated as President as a result of ample evidence being proffered that the election was stolen from the twice-impeached former commander in chief.
Perhaps leading the charge was Mike Lindell, founder and CEO of My Pillow, Inc., who has brazenly claimed he had “irrefutable evidence” that the election was fraudulent and that said evidence would lead to Trump being ushered back into the White House on August 13, 2021.
Now that the date has come and gone, legal experts are at a loss to explain why Trump wasn’t reinstated.
“It’s truly baffling,” said Devin Reader, former Dean of Legal Studies at the now-defunct Trump University. “Mike Lindell makes such a soft pillow. If I trust his product to rest my head on every night, I certainly trust him to understand the nuances of election law and the processes necessary to overturn an American presidential election for the first time in American history.”
Joanne Needham is equally puzzled. Working in the copy room at a major law firm, Joanne is well-versed in high-profile legal issues.
“Mike Lindell’s mustache screams credibility,” she stated. “Something must have happened to prevent Trump’s reinstatement. We need to get to the bottom of it,” she continued.
And Steve Taylor thinks he knows exactly what happened. Taylor, who runs a blog (patriotsforfreedomandliberty.squarespace.com) promoting conspiracy theories from his parents’ basement, claims, “we all know the deep state is in the Left’s corner. And the CDC [Center for Disease Control and Prevention] is the deep state of deep states.”
Taylor alleges that the CDC’s recent renewal of the eviction moratorium effectively prevented Trump from “evicting” Biden from the White House and assuming his rightful place as president.
“Everything was in place for Trump to resume his reign, but the CDC has once again used the Corona Virus hoax to ensure that Communist Joe Biden is President,” Taylor claims.
“You can’t make this stuff up,” he continued, without a hint of irony.
Editor’s Note: This story is satire. Sort of.
